Being a Home School Dad, Part 1 of Many

Better Than a Man of My Caliber Deserves

This is uncharted territory for me.  I am the product of a .gov school, k-12.  I had never even heard the term 'home schooled' until I met some genius kids in college.  They were 16 years old and tutoring folks several years older than them in calculus, computers and biology.  When I met the young lady that would become my wife I got to know the home school community from a different perspective, as she was raised in it.  Over the years I've seen folks that cover the entire spectrum from 'unschoolers' that value non-conformity above all else to the Classical Conversation Crew whose kids, I presume but cannot confirm, are speaking Latin over the dinner table.  Now as a homeschooling father of four I can say with confidence that, while the territory is uncharted the ships have been burned and we are moving forward with conviction.  Here are a few things that comprise the core of my stance on homeschooling and, more precisely, being a homeschooling dad.

First, we are not trying to reproduce what the .gov schools are doing.  I have had folks tell me that they home school because they have seen what the .gov schools are doing and think they can't possibly do any worse.  While I understand where they are coming from I cringe a little bit inside every time I hear that.  Like it or not, when a family makes the decision to educate their children in the home they are really saying 'thanks, but we can do this better.'  There is a bit of arrogance in that statement regardless of whether it comes from the crispy, sandal clad hippie with dreads or the 'we put the FU in fundamentalist' Christian.  So, if that is what we are saying then we better back it up.  Our actions and our final product best be in line with our attitude that we can, in fact, do it better.

Second, it's not because we fear that our children will become like the heathens.  Truth be told, we know them pretty well and need no convincing that they are heathen already.  We choose to educate in the home because we are convinced that a complete education must start with a Biblical worldview such as cannot be found in a .gov school.  I know, I know...you live in the mid-west and your kid's teacher is the pianist/drummer/head flag-waver on the synchronized dance and sign language team. But that's just not the same as a father and mother opening the Bible and helping to frame a child's perspective day in and day out.  And I know some folks want their kids to be salt and light.  That's cool.  We do too.  We just want to get them good and salty first.

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, at least according to my peers that choose not to home-school, what about the lack of the second income?  Doesn't your wife need to assert her inner lioness by juggling a career outside the home, daycare drop offs, dry-cleaner pickups and therapy appointments/medication when she realizes that she can't keep up with all of it and just doesn't understand why her little man now wants to use the girls restroom and wears mascara?  In response to that I just say 'nope, we've got different priorities'.  Yes, it does add some pressure on the husband and father to actually, you know, be the husband and father.  And yes, it means that the drive way has a couple of 20 something year old Chevys in various stages of functionality.  But hey, 2 windshield wipers seems like a bit of overkill, right?   And yes, I understand that this doesn't work for every couple.  I'm not saying they are wrong.  It's just how we roll and, apparently, diversity and tolerance are like the new patriotism.  So, you wave your flag and we'll wave ours.  We can still be on the same team.

I know there are some that will point to this and say 'see, it's just like I thought all along, these homeschooling folks just keep their women home barefoot and chained to the stove...these...these folks are a veritable cornucopia of deplorables', or something similar.  I'm certain I can't change any of those folks minds. But in reality things look a lot more like this.

The kids start each morning with a home-cooked meal by a beautiful woman wearing one of my shirts and then I open the Bible and we continue where we left off the day before.  Then I drag myself away from all that matters to me in the world to head off to an office where I do the modern equivalent of slaying the dragon or harvesting the wheat or some such overly romanticized version of trading my days for dollars.  She gives up all of that career chasing and stuff to fritter away her days molding and shaping the future of humanity.  That's all.  Just the trivial task of ensuring that Western Civilization as we know it does not crumble.  No biggie.  Maybe someday she will wish she had spent more time wrestling spreadsheets and less preparing our sons and daughters to carry the torch for humanity.  And maybe not.  My job is to ensure that she can do hers.  Hers is important...like, life and death important.  Mine is too, but only in so much as it allows her to focus on what really matters.  A great night ends up with the whole family snuggled up to watch a TV show produced before the mid 80's or sitting around an assortment of guitars and percussion instruments.  I know, I know, we could be texting them that dinner is ready so they could take it back to their rooms to eat while they play some video game with a 45 year old 'friend' they met online.  But heck, we are old-fashioned like that.

For a homeschooling dad, life is the classroom.  How we live, walk, talk, work and love all come together to mold the hearts and minds of our kids.  So live right, walk humbly, talk gently, work diligently and love with the fire of Christ.  After all, it's just your family name and heritage on the line.  And when we fall short of those ideas, show them all that a man runs to the cross and bows to the King.  That's where they really learn what salty looks like.